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DISCLAIMER:
This is not my best work. My time has been limited and my energies have be diverted in the past week. That said, I still hope you enjoy this week's issue.
May all your Christmases be white...or something chipper and heart-warming like that.
A dog went to a telegram office, took out a blank form and wrote: "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof." The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog, "There are only nine words here. You could send another 'Woof' for the same price." The dog replied, "But that would make no sense at all!" While this is alleged to be a quote, I couldn't find any supporting evidence. That said, it is about the dumbest (and funnies) analogy I've ever read: Jane was toast, and not the light buttery kind, nay, she was the kind that's been charred and blackened in the bottom of the toaster and has to be thrown a away because no matter how much of the burnt part you scrape off with a knife, there's always more blackened toast beneath, the kind that not even starving birds in winter will eat, that kind of toast.
Toast is one of my favorite things to
eat. I really believe that Toast and Crackers
should make up their own food-group have a 'recommended daily
allowance' in the double digits. So to
honor toast:
"You know that Pepperidge Farm bread, that stuff is
fancy.
That stuff is wrapped twice. Yeah, you open it, and then it still ain't open. That's why I don't buy it. I don't need another step between me and my toast." -- Mitch Hedberg "I was at this restaurant. The sign said 'Breakfast Anytime.' So I ordered French Toast in the Renaissance." -- Stephen Wright "Bread and water can so easily be toast and tea" -- Anonymous
My creative juices this week were being drained in other places, so I decided to use a short devotional I came across some time ago. "Hoeing the Garden"
One of the great joys in my life is steaming or frying up some fresh veggies from my garden and having the satisfaction of eating what I have grown myself. If you have ever grown a vegetable garden, you know that this does not happen easily. You really have to nurture the garden to get it to produce. Recently, after returning from a 10 day trip, I was welcomed by a garden of well overgrown weeds. Oh, it was still producing fine vegetables and the plants looked healthy enough, but left alone the weeds would have taken over. I could not rest until the weed were gone, so I immediately got the hoe after them. I find this in my Christian life as well. If I ever take a vacation from nurturing my walk with God, i.e. (spending time in His word, praying, serving, selflessness) weeds of sin will take over. Oh, I can still look fine (we learn to do that as Christians) and I can even still be fruitful in my ministries, but eventually, if I did not confront these areas, sin would take over and my Christian life would die. I have to daily not rest, take up my hoe and combat the thing that want to consume my life, sin. "If anyone wishes to come after
Me, let him deny himself,
and take up his cross daily and follow Me." - Luke 9:23 Keep on keeping on, Steve Leavitt
I realize this is probably more applicable to the Proposed Point & Click section, so call it 'creative license.' Last week in the "PP&C" section I mentioned being a Bzzagent, and promised more details this week. So, to keep that promise: A Bzzagent is someone who actively and intentionally participates in Word of Mouth Advertising. We all do it, the difference is Bzzagents are deliberate about it and more importantly attempt to record it, all in an effort to garner and/or spread information and (genuine) endorsements of a product or service. No, Bzzagents are not paid; though there is a token reward system, but that is based on numbers, not agreement or results. I realized when I started thinking about this, that I am both too new, and too zapped to accurately describe the program. However, I would urge you to check out the site to learn more www.Bzzagent.com.  It's fun, I get some free stuff, I get to share my opinion, and people act like they care about it. By the way, have you tried Iced Tea with Lipton's White Tea. You gotta try it. (that's a bzz)
This week's site isn't new, but I felt it was worth highlighting, just in case there was one person out there who had not yet seen it. Be inspired... If you have time, and don't mind a few words that would not not be welcome in church, I would tell you to listen/watch to Dr. Pausch's full speech given on September, 18, 2007 at Carnegie Mellon University -- HERE -- It is about an hour and fifteen minutes. |
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email:
funnies@clmcgown.com
phone:
888-819-1760 ext.10
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